That's Bananas!

Monday, I went for a walk and slipped on a banana peel. I did not think this was actually possible. I always wondered about the ubiquity of banana peel slippage in cartoons, TV, and especially among clowns. I scoffed at it, to be entirely honest And then, on Monday, I was walkin' back from the grocery store and slipped on a banana peel. My boyfriend--Lane--then made me re-enact the slip so he could photograph it. He said I looked more like I was in a production of The Wiz than that I was falling. But, what are ya gonna do?

We also proceeded, for the next six blocks, to partake of some serious clown humour. Eerily, when I got home and put on Gilmore Girls--my favorite television show ever--there were then two references to banana pill slipping. And, as if this were not enough, Lane informed me that there is a statue on Mount Royal with some square thing on top of, you guessed it, a pile of banana peels.

I'm not completely dense. I get it all ready, Universe. You are sending me a message. A message about banana peels. But, I'll be honest, you could have been less cryptic. It can't be to eat more bananas because I'm a fan of the banana--potassium equals no leg cramps from much walking. So, what is it? Are you telling me to give up this creative writing bit and go to Clown College? Should I move to a tropic environment and become a banana picker? Or is it my destiny to have my death announcement read "Felled by a rogue banana peel"?

Fess up all ready! I can't walk anywhere with my head up because I'm watching for peels which means I look like a great muggable target. I'm afraid of the fruit department at the grocery store. And lets not talk about the prospect of going to a zoo; I don't have a brown paper bag handy.

And, seriously, there are cooler things I could be focused on. I'm missing the CEO of NPR talking a few floors above me as I type. But, I'm fixated on the why of the Great Banana Extravaganza of 2009. I have a book to make, two books to write about, and a poem to create. But do you know the only thing I can see? Banana peels! Either I was a chimp in a past life or bananas are sentient and are trying to tell me that they don't like being breakfast.

Of course, were the latter the case I would say there are better people to receive this message. Hey, maybe they want me to solve these horrible banana crimes. Maybe they were runaway bananas, just trying to get back to their bunch and now, like Haley Joel Osment, I see dead bananas. I just don't know!

Maybe I'll write a poem about these dead bananas. Maybe they just want me to give them a voice, to let their side of the tale be heard.

If so, I'm thankful that Thomas Sayers Ellis, performance poet, was a guest in class last week's class (which was cool and terrifying) and won't be here this week.

Oh, Banana Gods, what do you want from me?

Things I Found This Week: Never doubt Mom's rules, i.e. If in doubt, throw it out. (I may have poisoned myself on Saturday by eating chicken--bought that day--that was bad. I avoided poisoning myself today by throwing out taco shells that were sour. Yeah. I have a cooking gift.) Firefox is magic--I can cut and paste in Blogger now. And, very few people clean up after their dogs when it rains.

Things I Still Need to Find: What the bananas want! When they are showing Howl's Moving Castle in the Student Center. (I think the first week of November.) And, a good pair of tennis shoes for the gym.